The Earth Downtown Marathon Thingy, Now With Goo!
by ClockwerkOrange
Summary: When fliers are passed out at 'Skool' alerting Zim, Dib, and others of a marathon that will take place downtown, only time will tell how the race will play out in the end. Could be just a pinch of ZATR. Or a lot. Read and review for GREAT JUSTICE! Goo.
1. And So It Begins

**[Authors Note for Great Justice: **

**Well, this is my first Invader Zim story, and I have a feeling it will be very nice. I'm not giving too much away at this point (Mainly because I've only imagined the beginning and end thus far...!), but this story has, in my opinion, promise. For serious! Now, read! Hahahahaha!**

**~CWO]**

Zim was, as usual, avoiding the lunch sitting before him. He prodded the strange goo briefly with his spoon, and then grimaced. It was a strange, goopy beige goo. Zim had a theory as to its origin. He believed strongly - since this 'food' always was served after a day during which another green goopy substance was served - that, _and this was the __**ingenious **__part..._ it must be some sort of fermented mutation! _OF COURSE!_

As Zim was pondering his _**incredible**__ powers of deduction, _he was overcome by a horrible sense of being... _WATCHED... _by _SOMEONE!_ Zim's eyes darted around the cafeteria, checking if someone really was... _watching. _Zim finally noticed _the DIB _staring right at him. "_Dib! WHY ARE YOU STARING AT ME, ZIM?"_

The eyes of the cafeteria shifted to Dib. "Uh. Why were _you _looking at _me?_" he asked, loudly.

"I was merely marveling at the size of your Death Star-esque head," Zim sneered, which caused the cafeteria to erupt in raucous laughter.

"Nice one, Zim!" a female student by the name of Zita yelled, showing a big thumbs up.

"Yeah!" another one called.

"Yes, yes, Zim knows that he is amazing, but thank you for reminding him," Zim said while waving and smiling widely.

"Zim's a jerk," Dib muttered, still seated at his usual table with his sister, Gaz.

"I thought that was funny," Gaz muttered, squinting at the Game Slave 3 that she had purchased just three months before.

"You bought that thing three months ago. Doesn't it ever get..." Dib trailed off, gesturing his right hand in a circle in a motion of trying to remember something, "I don't know... boring?"

Gaz stopped mashing buttons. "Never... call it... a 'thing'..." she hissed. The button mashing then continued.

"Speaking of boring, Zim hasn't really done anything since that big pizza fiasco at the carnival."

Gaz paused her playing again. "That... that was _delicious.._."

Dib's eye twitched. "It... it was _horrifying... HORRIFYING!"_ he shouted, standing on his seat. The other school kids were staring. Dib sighed and sat back down.

"Attention doomed boys and girls," Mrs. Bitters called coarsely, walking down the aisle between the rows of tables. "I'm here to inform you of a marathon that will take place in the city. It's open to any boys, girls, parents, or anyone you know that would want to participate in a _hideous monument to the doomed concept of exercise._" She began passing out flyers, and one came to rest in front of Dib.

"Gaz, look at this," Dib muttered while holding the paper. "'Come, one and all to the fantastic Downtown Marathon Footrace! All pathetic humans who would like to participate must come to the Marathon start point in front of the Deelishus Weenie stand tomorrow morning'," Dib pointed to the flyer. "'Pathetic humans'? This is definitely Zim." Dib looked up to see Zim curiously inspecting another flyer.

"I don't think so. See? That's a curious expression, Dib. C-U-R-" Gaz began mockingly, but was cut off.

"I know how to spell 'curious', Gaz. Okay, maybe Zim's having a good day today and realizes we're watching. I just know this is Zim's work. I mean, come on, 'Pathetic humans'?" he chuckled, but then stopped when he realized everyone had left the cafeteria. "Gaz! Wait up! Geez, I've got to stop talking to myself..."

Once school was over, Zim utilized his trademark walk and stepped down the 'Skool' stairs. Recalling the typo, Zim looked up at the school's 'Skool' sign and frowned. "They should really fix that." He shook his head and continued down the sidewalk. "Hmph. Marathon. I've got better things to do than... walk... faster than..." Zim paused, drawing in a big breath, "_HIDEOUS HUMANS_ on a Saturday." Zim tugged on his right glove out of habit, and then muttered, "I have to work on my next _INGENIOUS_ plan, anyway." Zim sighed, continued walking, and whispered, "Now, should I use brain-washing or hypnosis on the..." he paused. "Wait, is there even a difference?"

"Master!" a shrill voice called.

"Oh, no..." Zim groaned, continuing to walk as a little robot in a green dog suit bounced up. "GIR, I told you to stay at base."

"But Mister Piggy said..."

"I don't care what Mister Piggy said!" Zim shouted, flailing his arms. He continued his walk.

GIR sniffled, causing Zim to sigh and turn around. "What?"

"Mister Piggy... told me... you needed..." GIR wailed.

"I needed what, GIR? Spit it out!"

"_A big hug!_" GIR shouted, jumping onto Zim.

"No, no, GIR! Off! Get off!" Zim yelled, tripping over himself. GIR obediently leaped onto the ground and continued walking with Zim.

"So, what's up witchu?" GIR asked.

"I received a pathetic excuse of a _CHALLENGE _for a marathon that will take place tomorrow morning, downtown!" Zim shouted, whipping the flyer out of his pocket. "_PATHETIC!_" he repeated, loudly.

"I wanna!" GIR yelled, waving his arms.

"You 'wanna' what?" Zim asked.

"I wanna do the Mamazon thingy!" GIR shouted.

"The marathon?" Zim asked glumly.

"Yeah, that."

"GIR, I strongly dislike taking part in any activity with the _ENEMY_!" Zim shouted, waving a clenched fist at the sky.

GIR began to tear up.

"Ugh! Fine!" Zim shouted, stuffing the flyer into his back pocket, which was a recent and _INGENIOUS_ addition to his _SUPERIOR_ _PANTS!_

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! I'm gonna be in a marathon!" GIR shouted, running in a circle around Zim, who was still walking. Zim furrowed his brow (Or, at least, where his brows _would _be...) and remembered that the _PATHETIC DIB MONKEY_ had been inspecting a marathon flyer.

"Oh, I shall enjoy destroying Dib in the race," Zim commented, rubbing his gloved hands together.

"I... I wanna be a mongoose," GIR stated.

"Yes, GIR. You shall be a mongoose when I have my _VICTORY!_" Zim let loose a trademark laugh.

"Wheeeeee!" GIR screamed, jumping onto Zim's head.

"...Off."


	2. Here's a Sandwich

Zim yawned, stretched his arms out, and pulled himself into a semi-upright position on the couch.

"Hiya!" GIR called, squeaking into the room with his green dog disguise, holding a plate with a croissant on it.

"Yes... When do we have to go to the marathon this morning?" Zim asked lazily as GIR unzipped his disguise.

"Eight o'clock!" GIR screamed and then sat on the couch once Zim pulled his legs up a little bit. GIR threw the croissant into the air and ate it.

"Interesting," Zim commented, yawning, "And what time is it now?"

GIR thought for a minute. "Seven forty-two..."

Zim's jaw dropped. "Seven... forty-two?"

"Yep!" GIR yelled.

Zim sat stone-still for a few seconds...

"I'm _laaaaaaaaaaaaaate!_" he screamed. He jumped off of the couch, and then landed face-first on the floor. He jumped up, ran to the entrance, pulled open the door, and shot down the sidewalk with GIR following him quickly, now back in his dog disguise.

"You forgot your outfit!" GIR squealed.

Zim ran his hand over the top of his head and noticed that he _didn't have his wig or contacts...! _

He ran back into the house, screaming all the way, and paced out coolly with his disguise on.

"Right! Let's get to the race!" Zim shouted, pointing with authority down the street.

"Downtown's that way," GIR commented, pointing the opposite direction.

"...Right!" Zim yelled. "Let's do it!"

GIR stared at him.

"Yes! Now!"

GIR continued staring.

Zim sighed. "GIR," he began, "Take me to the starting point."

"Oh, right, that," GIR giggled. "I broke my rockets last week. Hee."

"You _broke _them? How?" Zim asked astoundedly.

"Um... I sort of ate them."

"You... ate your rockets...?" Zim asked, teeth clenched tightly. A vein pulsed in his forehead.

"Yeah... sooooo...?" GIR ventured. "Don't you have a marathon to go to...?"

Zim paused for a moment, and then began screaming. Then, he paused again.

"Yes," he replied, then started running down the sidewalk. GIR followed.

"GIR, maybe... you should just... watch the... house," Zim panted.

"I wanna race, too!" GIR squealed.

"GIR... I don't think... they let... robots... or dogs... race in marathons..." Zim forced out, still running.

"Awww..."

_Meanwhile, at the starting point..._

Several children from Skool, some parents, and some other _equally hideous_ humans were collected near the start line.

"Greetings, human racing people. The race is about to begin in about... six minutes!"

"Who's that guy?" one kid asked another.

"I dunno. He looks like a creep."

"Hey, do you see that girl?"

"The one with the face?"

"Yeah, the one with the face!"

"What are you guys talking about?"

"That girl! She looks familiar..."

"That's Tak!"

"Tak? You mean Tak from earlier this year Tak?"

"The one that disappeared after being in Skool for... like, a day?"

"What's _she _doing here?"

"Hey, look, it's that Zim kid!"

"What a creep. Come on, let's all wait somewhere else."

"Ah, GIR, we've arrived... just in time..." Zim squeaked, completely out of breath before the race even began.

"Yay!" GIR squealed. "Hey, whozat?"

Zim was staring blankly past the crowd of children.

"Master?"

"Shhhh! GIR! That's _Tak! On Earth! Here! Right now!"_ Zim whispered.

"So?"

"_So? _She tried to steal my _mission!_ And now she's probably going to try to _kill _me this time!" Zim paused. "Not that she will succeed, of course."

"Just three minutes left until the race begins!"

"Hey, master, look! It's the tall guy!"

"Tall guy...? What?" Zim asked, looking over to where GIR was pointing. He spotted an obviously disguised Irken with sunglasses and a baseball cap. It was one of the Almighty Tallest! Zim ran over through the crowd quickly and tugged on his 'Earth Sport Team' baseball shirt.

"Oh, hey Zim," he greeted, voice showing that it was Purple. "Race's about to begin."

"My Tallest, what are you doing on this planet? I haven't gotten around to completely conquering it yet..." Zim muttered.

"Well, we decided that it would be pretty fun to host a marathon on this planet. You know, Irkens back home have to watch _something..._ It was Tak's idea."

"Tak? But Tak was trying to steal my mission! Why didn't you have her arrested?" Zim asked.

"Well, she had good intentions."

"Good intentions? She was trying to blow up my ship!"

"Yeah, but it had to do with snacks. Anyway, I hope you have fun running the marathon," Purple commented. "Winner gets a _maaaaaaaagic laaaaaaamp_that will grant you _one wiiiiiish," _Purple said, waving his arms around mystically.

"A wish?" Zim asked, rolling his eyes. "Are you kidding?"

Purple paused for a moment. "_Nooooooooo..._" he whispered, wiggling his arms again.

"Uh. Okay. _ZIM SHALL BE VICTORIOUS!_"

"Um... Good luck with that. Oh, hey, look, it's time. _GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!_"

"Say what?" Zim asked blankly.

Everyone began running.

"Uh, first checkpoint's marked on the big signs along the way, race has started, have fun!" Purple yelled, walking off to the side of the road.

Zim looked around at the children and few adults starting to race. A few adults gave up then and there, but a few actually started. His gaze connected with Tak's, and she gave him a double thumbs down with a grin as she started to run.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Zim screamed, "I WILL NOT GIVE YOU THE SATISFACTION OF MY DEFEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!" He began running.

"Wutcha screamin' about, Master?" GIR asked, running next to Zim.

"I... I ran too hard to get here... I'm... Damn...!" Zim muttered, slowing to a halt. Everyone else had already rounded the first block corner. The road was deserted.

Suddenly, there was a plume of red smoke with green confetti spiraling to the ground around it next to Zim, revealing a female Irken with pale green eyes and a magician's outfit composed of a green shirt, white pants, a black cloak, and a top hat. She was holding a short black cane with white tips on each side.

"Hiya!" the magician greeted, tucking the cane under her arm and shaking Zim's hand with both hands. "I'm Mint! This race? Fun, fun, fun! Your progress?" she paused, inhaled, and then continued, "_UNSATISFACTORY!_ Your odds? Very small. Viewing range of this marathon? Huge. Betting? Widespread. Did I bet? Yes. Did I bet on you? Yes. How much?" she paused again, inhaled, exhaled, inhaled again, then continued, "_SIX MILLION MONIES!_" she screamed, jumping up and down while shaking her arms erratically. "I wanna help you. Motivation? I bet on you. Reasons? Odds for you are microscopic. So? If I win, I'll be a billionaire. What am I gonna do? _This!_" she squealed, thrashing her wand around.

Zim stared blankly at her.

GIR cocked his head in deep thought. "Wudja do?"

"What'd I do? Made it so Zim won't ever give up!" Mint squealed, and spun around theatrically. "Here's a sandwich," she said, handing Zim a sandwich, "Toodles!"

And then, poof, she was gone.

"Um..." Zim said.

"Let's gooooooo!" GIR yelled, tugging Zim along.

"Well, I don't feel like giving up as much, I guess..." Zim muttered. "Maybe the crazy Irken girl wasn't just a nutjob."

"Master's prancin' like a pony!" GIR screamed.

"Silence!"


	3. For Great Justice

"What's wrong, master?" GIR asked.

"Tired... Probably should have cheated..." Zim remarked, running steadily. He was near the middle of the pack of racing children now. Tak was near the front, and the Dib-human was around the first quarter of the crowd.

"It's amazing that such a large-headed being could run that quickly without falling over," Zim commented.

"Wheeeeeee!" GIR screamed, weaving through the crowd.

"GIR! No!" Zim shouted.

A few children were tripped and fell over.

"Hmm," Zim said. "On second thought, keep doing that."

GIR saluted in mid-run. "Yes, my master!"

_On the "Weekly Intergalactic Race" program, broadcasting from a ship in geosynchronous orbit above the actual race..._

"Greetings and salutations, dedicated viewers!" a tall, but not as quite as tall as the Tallest, Irken female greeted. The camera focused on her as she gestured towards a large monitor showing the pack of humans running.

"As you can see, this week's race is really beginning to become interesting," she commented, pointing at Tak in the front. "Our very own Irken champion, Tak, is at the front!"

The studio audience roared with approval.

"Whereas Zim," she paused, "Who I'm sure you're all familiar with..."

The studio audience booed.

"He is about... halfway to first place. He looks tired. Probably should have cheated."

The audience chattered and nodded their heads in agreement.

"You people are _wrong, wrong, wrong!_" a lone voice squeaked. "Zim's going to _win, win, win!_"

"Pfft," the host of the show said, rolling her eyes. "No, he isn't."

"Yes, he _is!_" the speaker, Mint, called, shaking her fist. She sat back down, pouting and crossing her arms.

"Nice magician outfit, weirdo," someone in the audience commented. "Know any card tricks?"

Mint glared at the Irken who had said that, and punched him in the jaw. "_Is this your card?_"

"Okay, studio audience, remember not to anger the strange magician lady," the host commented, turning back to the screen. "Oh, my goodness! I can't believe what I'm seeing!"

_Back on Earth..._

"Yes, GIR! Well done!" Zim squealed, running up to the front of the racers. GIR had run directly into Tak, sending her crashing to the ground. Zim caught up to GIR and took position at the head of the group.

"GIR, we're almost to the first checkpoint! I think we might actually win this hideous marathon!" Zim shouted, flailing his arms around. "Take that, pitiful humans!"

"Curse you, Zim!" Tak screamed, standing back up and continuing from the back.

_Back in the studio-ship thing..._

"Hah! Told you!" Mint shouted, clapping.

Everyone else was silent from complete and utter shock.

"Uh... uh... _Zim _is in first place... and... um..." the host said, antennae curling. Her eye twitched.

_And back on Earth..._

Dib's brain exploded. _Figuratively. _

_That's Tak! _

Really, Captain Obvious?

_Why would she come all the way back to Earth for a marathon? Just to humiliate Zim? _Dib raised an eyebrow and pulled the marathon flyer out of his pocket. Flipping it over, he looked at the back.

_'The winner receives a magical lamp that will grant one wish'?_

"Pfft."

_'No, really'?_

Dib dropped the flyer. "Of _course..._"

"Attention, runners!" a commanding voice called over some kind of speaker system, "Due to a rabid weasel attack, the marathon's finish line has been shortened to the second checkpoint, effectively cutting the 26-mile race down to... one and a half miles."

"Oh. Well. Now or never!" Tak shouted. No one paid much attention. She rolled her eyes and pulled a black sphere out of her pocket. She pressed the big red button on it and threw it on the ground. It produced a smokescreen, and out of the smokescreen came Tak riding on... a moose.

Dib dropped back slightly and ran alongside Tak's moose.

"Um, Tak, hi, uh..."

"Who were you again?" Tak asked with a grimace.

"I'm Dib. You know. Stopped your evil plan."

"Oh, yeah. The big-headed human," she remarked.

"My head's not big!" Dib screamed. "Anyway, why are you riding a moose?"

"Well, I'm beginning to have second thoughts about it now. According to the official Irken records on the planet Earth, the moose is supposedly the fastest land animal. Of course, I have a feeling that Zim's malfunctioning SIR unit is the one responsible for supplying that information, so..."

"Hmm," Dib commented.

Tak screamed. Loudly. For, like, ten seconds.

"Um..."

"Come _on, _moose-animal-thing! Run faster! I _believe _in you!" Tak shouted.

The moose, who had never had anyone believe in it before, began walking slightly faster. Slightly faster enough to gain on Zim and the few remaining kids.

Dib fell over, gasping for breath. He had just hit... the _wall._

**[Author's Note:**

**"Hello," ClockwerkOrange stated, shaking a certain Dave Martin's hand. "Could you tell us about hitting... the 'wall'?"**

"**Hitting the 'wall' is basically about running out of energy," remarked Dr. Martin, Professor of Health Sciences at Georgia State University in Atlanta. "Chemical energy, that is, stored in the form of adenosine triphosphate and obtained from the breakdown, or metabolism, of energy-containing fuel. The runner's primary fuel sources are carbohydrates, in the form of blood glucose and glycogen, a polymer of glucose stored in the muscles and liver, and fats, free fatty acids in the bloodstream and muscle triglycerides, molecules containing three fatty acids."**

**"And that was, again, Dr. Martin, Professor of Health Sciences."]**

Five seconds later, every single runner in the crowd hit the 'wall' and dropped to the ground, except Zim and Tak's moose.

"Attention, runners, you are now twenty feet away from the finish line!"

Zim laughed, running with GIR to the finish line. Tak and the moose were still too far behind.

_In the space-studio-ship-place..._

"Aw, yeah! _Aw, yeah...! _Who's winning, who's winning?" Mint squealed, dancing.

_Back at the race..._

Of course, Zim was not invincible. Or a very strong runner. He gasped, and .2 seconds later flopped onto the ground. GIR stopped, and walked towards him.

"GIR... GIR..." Zim called, voice weak.

"Yes, master?" GIR inquired.

"I'm... I'm very... hungry..."

GIR nodded with understanding. He handed Zim the sandwich that he had been holding since Mint bestowed it to him.

Zim took a bite out of the sandwich, and stood up. "I can stand! _I can race!_" he shouted in triumph.

He took one step and flopped back onto the ground.

"Oh, Zim, you really are quite sad," Tak remarked, guiding the moose next to Zim. "I guess I can't leave you to die. _Right now, anyway._"

She grabbed Zim by the collar and slung him across the moose in front of her. GIR, in turn, jumped on Zim's PAK.

"Uh, crazy purple lady?" GIR asked, pointing behind them.

"What is it?" Tak asked, annoyed.

"Your spaceship is trying to killus..." GIR said.

"Hahaha! You can't escape me this time, aliens!" Dib shouted, flying Tak's previously crashed ship towards them.

**[Another Author's Note: Right now, cue the playing of the song "Sultans of Swing" by Dire Straits. It's appropriate. Not the lyrics, really, but the music... yes. Go ahead, look it up. I'll wait.]**

"Zim. Are you conscious?" Tak asked quietly.

"Ungh. Wha?" Zim asked, still slung on the moose.

"Do you have some form of laser weaponry on hand?" Tak asked.

"Of course. Who do you take me for?" Zim asked, voice muffled by the moose he pulled himself up a bit. "I am _ZIM!_"

"Yes, yes. Get on my lap," Tak instructed.

Zim's face swung towards Tak. His jaw had dropped, and there was a look of complete surprise on his face. "D-don't you think that's being a little forward?" Zim asked, horrified.

Tak's face went a shade of deepest, darkest blood red, but, to her credit, she managed to keep a grimace. "Um... th-that's not what I meant. I meant... you give me a weapon, you drive the moose, and I shoot."

"Uh. Th-that's what I thought you meant," Zim commented. He wasn't moving.

"Well?" Tak asked.

"Uh."

"Hurry! That idiot is getting closer with _my _ship!"

Zim sighed, did as she suggested, and convinced the moose to keep walking forward. Tak turned halfway around, pulled a laser out of Zim's PAK - always come prepared - and fired at where _her _ship's antigravity pod would be near the base of the ship. The ship wobbled, lost control, and smashed into the street just as Zim and Tak crossed the finish line.

"Congratulations... _Zim?_" Red said, surprised. He was wearing a tuxedo, rainbow afro, and sunglasses. "Uh. Whatever. Here's a _magical lamp _that will grant you one wish," he paused, got close to Zim and whispered, "Try not to destroy our civilization, okay?"

"What do you mean, 'congratulations, Zim'?" Tak screamed. "I crossed the finish line first!"

"Uh, yeah, but Zim's foot made it before any part of you crossed the finish line. Too bad for you," Red commented, handing Zim a generic lamp, complete with light bulb and lampshade.

"This is a magic lamp? I was expecting something... Egyptian-y," Zim commented.

"Yeah, well," Red muttered.

"It's not fair!" Tak screamed, stamping her foot on the ground.

"Uh. I wish that Tak..." Zim began quietly.

GIR, who was still latched onto Zim's PAK, said, "...I had a giant cabbage!"

"_YOUR WISH IS GRANTED!_" the lamp shouted, and transformed into a cabbage that was roughly three times larger than a normal one.

Zim, Tak, and Red's jaws dropped.

"Wheeeeeeee!" GIR yelled, grabbing the cabbage.

A few feet away, Dib crawled out of Tak's ship. A few police officers pulled him up.

"Thanks," Dib said. "But, look! If that wasn't proof that Zim is an alien, I don't know what is! He had a crazy alien laser in his backpack! Didn't you see that?"

One of the police officers, a captain, grunted. "I saw a lot of things, kid. I saw you inside an alien spacecraft armed with alien weapons and flying in a very alien way."

"Wh-what?" Dib asked, backing up.

"Get him!" the captain shouted. One officer put handcuffs on Dib. "Good luck trying to talk your way out of this one, _alien,_" the captain commented. "Take him away!"

"No... _No...!_" Dib shouted, trying to escape. "I'm _not_ an alien!"

"And then the world was safe," the police captain commented, ignoring Dib's wiggling and cries for freedom.

"So, Zim, what were you wishing for that included me?" Tak asked suspiciously.

"Uh... well, it doesn't matter, now," Zim muttered, giving GIR a sour look. GIR was hugging the cabbage.

"I'm curious."

Zim avoided her eyes. "Um..."

_Back at the studio..._

Mint was laughing maniacally while accepting several bags with the symbol for monies on them.

"Rich, rich, _rich!_" she squeaked.

_Back on Earth..._

"I was going to wish that you had won the lamp instead of me, actually..." Zim admitted.

Tak raised an eyebrow. "Really?" she asked. "Zim, as in, _the _Zim decides to play fair?"

"Yeah, well, the great Zim sometimes has his moments," Zim commented. "That, and..." he mumbled.

"What was that?" Tak asked suspiciously.

"Master said that he-" GIR said, before Zim grabbed his cabbage and threw it down the street. GIR ran after it.

"Well... uh... Zim believes you to be..." Zim's expression twisted as he tried to force out the word... "Cute?"

"If you ever say that again, I'll kill you," Tak commented. "Oh, and your voice makes me ill."

"I would _hate _to break up such a special moment," Red remarked, "But I gotta go! Buh-bye!" And there he went, floating off.

"Hmm. I must leave as well," Tak muttered. "This was a bust."

"Tak! Wait!" Zim called.

"What is it, _Zim?_" Tak shouted.

"What were _you _going to wish for?" he asked.

Tak's expression blanked. "Erm... Before I was nearing the finish line, I was going to wish to be an invader..."

Zim's eyes narrowed. "But what were you going to wish for when you thought you had won?"

"Uh... I was going to wish for..." her eyes darted around, eventually hitting a large advertisement in the window of a grocery store. "Bacon! Lots of bacon. Can't get enough of the stuff."

"_Right._" Zim said. "Of course."

"Uh... and Zim?" she asked.

"Yes?"

"Sorry about trying to kill you."

"Ah, Zim has survived worse," he commented. "I mean, I remember one time on-"

He was silenced when Tak's lips touched his for a short moment.

"Right! Well!" Tak shouted, eyes narrowing. "Next time we meet, we shall be enemies of the worst kind!"

"Um, yeah," Zim said breathlessly.

"I will not hesitate to destroy you!"

"'Kay."

"I will crush your skull underfoot!"

"Uh-huh."

"...Bye, Zim," she whispered, waving.

"Bye."

_Back on the ship..._

"And that heartfelt moment concludes the Weekly Intergalactic Race on Irken TV-12!" the host shouted. "We'll see you next time!"

"I'm _rich!_" Mint squealed, doing a little dance. "If I were a rich girl, ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum, all day long I'd biddy biddy bum..."

**[Author's FINAL NOTE OF JUSTICE: I hope you enjoyed the ending and the not-so-subtle nod to that one song from Fiddler on the Roof. If you don't review, however, I'll... I'll do something drastic.]**


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